the first day

so, the first day of class for me was thursday the 27th.  and, it was a good one.  i really enjoyed getting to meet each of my classes and to begin to get to know who my students are.  they seem like a lively and engaged bunch so far.  i feel like the semester will be a fun one, once it gets started.

first days are always hard for me.  there's a lot of talking and "entertaining" that i have to do, and the whole thing just lacks momentum.  that takes a few weeks to start to really build.  so then i end up in a kind of limbo--all that remains to be done over the course of the term seems so daunting, but there is relatively little work that has to be done immediately.  so, here i am.  pressing through the limbo part and eagerly anticipating the part where the gears click in and the ride of the semester really begins.

it's really rainin' out

a storm just arrived and now my windows are open and i'm listening to the rain pour down and the thunder rumble. i love it. especially since today--the first official day of classes--i don't have to be on campus.

it almost always storms on the first day of classes. pathetic fallacy? i think so. usually, i teach on tu/th and don't have to be there, but part of me feels a little sad for the freshmen, many of whom have probably thought long and hard about their "first-day-of-college-classes look" and now have to walk to class through torrential rain, ruining whatever impression it was they wanted to make. poor little rain-soaked freshmen. at least they'll be joined by rain-soaked teachers!

the strength of my convictions...

got me out of bed at my new "new year, new you" time. now i'm sitting in the kitchen, drinking my coffee, reading, and listening to NPR as it plays softly in the background. any wagers on how many mornings will go like this?

a new year

i met my freshman advisees for the first time yesterday, just hours after they moved into the dorms. i made them all write a letter to themselves, reflecting on how they felt on their first day on campus and what they hoped the semester would hold for them. seems like it might be good for me to make myself do the same thing.

the start of a new school year always feels more like a time for resolutions, etc. to me than a new calendar year ever does. it's also a time that i try to remember what i want my life to look like and who i want to be-come. this year, i think my sense of a need for balance and groundedness is stronger than ever. it's my 6th year in my job. it's time to apply for tenure, which involves a lot of looking back and a lot of looking forward. and, in the midst of that, i feel like it's easy to feel off-kilter and a little bit crazy. so. balance. groundedness. these are my goals for this school year. i want to try to include things like hobbies (embroidery, learning to play the guitar, cooking, etc.) and exercise into my schedule on a more regular basis. i want to be in the Bible more consistently and more deeply. i want to remember that, at its core, my job is FUN. i like what i do. i want to give in to my creative side and my wacky side. i want to embrace and express exuberance. (how's that for some fun alliteration?!) sometimes i wonder if that would be easier to do in a place like the cool school/church/house i saw in wisconsin this summer (pictured above). doesn't it just make sense that all of those things could/should be in one place? nice, i think.

we'll see how it all goes. my students get the letters they wrote back at the end of the term. i'll have to come back here, re-read, re-think and reflect on how the semester has gone. hopefully i'll be in a place that feels more grounded and not less. watchword for the term: God is in control. i guess, really, that should always be my watchword. but right now, it feels like i need to be even more mindful of that than usual.

oh. and i want to listen to NPR more. how's that for a resolution?

catcher in the rye. again.

so, i just finished reading j.d. salinger's catcher in the rye. this is a book that i've read, oh, maybe 4, now 5 times. i first read it when i was in high school. even though it was required reading, i loved it. but i didn't "get" his angst. i didn't "get" his anger. i didn't understand how or why anyone would flunk out of school. especially not why they would do it repeatedly. holden was my peer, but he felt like a stranger more than a friend. holden was that kid who smoked by the lockers and who i looked at with curiousity--but not with understanding.

then i read the book a few more times when i was in grad school. it was a lovely change of pace from my steady diet of renaissance and early american lit. and, to be truthful, i hardly even thought about what i was reading. i just read it. and i was glad it was in a modern font and that it used language in it that was pretty much like my own. i liked phoebe.

having just read it again, i found that it broke my heart in all sorts of new ways. i realized that i am twice holden's age. a sobering realization. and i realized that holden and i probably had more in common when i first read the book than i could recognize then. he rebeled. i pleased. but, in effect, we were both in search of our more authentic selves. and i think that search, which was terrifying then, is compelling and encouraging to me now. holden knows things. he knows that we encounter a lot of "phonies" in this life. he knows that he wants to be comfortable in his own skin. he knows that some guys are dopey--but he also knows that maybe, just maybe, they are also terrific whistlers. and, more than anything, holden knows that sometimes we can all be madmen (or women). sometimes we know what we know, we know what we value, we know what we want to be--and we mess it up anyway. madmen.

midnight in the garden of...good and green? an update

garden update: the thing has gone nuts! it's getting to be quite the jungle in there. and i'm eating its fruits as fast as i can, trying to share them with friends along the way. here are some pictures, because it's too late to actually write anything, but not too late to mess around on the internet, posting some photos.